Today in History: December 31, Edison demonstrates incandescent lights in Menlo Park

Well, folks, we’ve made it to December 31, 2024, the 366th day of this never-ending circus, also known as New Year’s Eve.

Back in 1879, Thomas Edison decided to throw the ultimate light party, lighting up Menlo Park like it was the Vegas Strip, proving once and for all that darkness is so last century.

Fast forward to 1904, Times Square got its first taste of New Year’s Eve chaos with 200,000 people crowding in, probably just to see if they could count down from ten without someone starting a riot.

Tragedy struck in 1972 when baseball legend Roberto Clemente, in a last-minute “I’ll save the world” move, crashed into a plane ticket to heaven instead of Nicaragua. And in ’85, Rick Nelson’s flight to a New Year’s gig turned into a fiery ‘farewell tour’ no one signed up for.

By 1995, the comic world was in mourning as “Calvin and Hobbes” ended its run, leaving us all wondering what those two would be up to in the digital age.

In 1999, President Yeltsin said, “I’m out,” handing the keys to Russia to Vladimir Putin, who was probably like, “Thanks, I’ll take it from here.”

Fast forward to 2019, Wuhan officials were all like, “Hey, there’s this new respiratory thing going around, but don’t worry, it’s probably nothing,” which, as we all know, turned into the understatement of the millennium, aka COVID-19.

And in 2022, Pope Benedict XVI, who decided retirement was better than sainthood, left us for the big basilica in the sky.

As for today’s birthday bash, we’ve got Sir Anthony Hopkins at a spry 87, still scaring us with his acting, not his age. The Police’s Andy Summers is 82, proving rock stars age like fine wine. Ben Kingsley’s still rocking at 81, probably still figuring out the best way to say “Gandhi” in every language.

Happy Birthday to Diane von Fürstenberg, who at 78 is still making sure everyone’s wrapped in style. Tim Matheson and Bebe Neuwirth are aging like fine Hollywood props. Gong Li and Nicholas Sparks are both hitting 59, one through dramatic storytelling, the other through… well, dramatic storytelling too.

Donald Trump Jr. turns 47, probably tweeting about it. Senator Josh Hawley celebrates at 45, possibly with a new constitutional amendment in hand. And Gabby Douglas, at just 29, might be planning her return to the gymnastics mat or just enjoying some cake.

So here’s to another year, may it be filled with less pandemics and more light bulb moments!