OMG! NJ Just Said ‘LOL’ to Teacher Literacy Tests – Your Kid’s Education is DOOMED!
Oh, New Jersey, you’ve done it again! In a move that screams “Why bother with education?”, Governor Phil Murphy has signed into law a doozy that effectively tells future teachers, “Hey, reading, writing, and math? Optional!” That’s right, folks, starting January 1, 2025, you no longer need to prove you can read beyond comic books or count past your fingers to teach our precious snowflakes. Welcome to the circus, folks, where the clowns are now in charge of the classroom!
In what seems like a desperate attempt to fill classrooms with warm bodies rather than qualified educators, this law, known as Act 1669, ditches the Praxis Core Test. This was the last line of defense ensuring that teachers knew basic skills – you know, those pesky things like literacy and numeracy. But hey, who needs that when we can have teachers who might not even understand the instructions on a juice box?
Supporters of this legislative masterpiece argue it’s all about addressing the teacher shortage. Oh, sure, because nothing says “quality education” like lowering the bar until it’s just a line in the sand. They claim this will bring more “diverse” educators into the system. Great, diversity is fantastic, but if diverse now means “diverse in their inability to spell ‘diverse’,” then we’re in for a real treat
Critics, and by that, I mean every parent with half a brain cell left after dealing with this nonsense, are up in arms. We’re supposed to trust our children’s future to people who couldn’t pass a basic skills test? In a state where students are already struggling to bounce back from the educational apocalypse known as remote learning, this is like throwing gasoline on a fire. “But they have a degree!” they cry. Oh, fabulous, a degree in what? Basket weaving from the University of TikTok?
And let’s not forget the reactions from the peanut gallery on X, where the consensus seems to be a mix of disbelief, sarcasm, and outright horror. One user even likened this to the dress color debate – but at least that only affected our sanity, not our kids’ education
So, as we wave goodbye to any semblance of educational standards, parents are left wondering: What’s next, New Jersey? Removing the need for teachers to speak English? Oh wait, that might actually be the next logical step in this grand scheme of turning our schools into a parody of learning.
Buckle up, parents. The ride to educational oblivion has just gotten a few notches dumber, and we’re all along for the ride, whether we like it or not. Here’s to hoping our kids can teach themselves because, apparently, that’s the new educational strategy in the Garden State.
Education, New Jersey style: If you can’t read this, you’re hired!
